No, I am not talking about homework.
Rather, my thinking is revolving around two aspects of a life:
- a sense of home, and what may be called
- lifework, all the studies, learning, training, making-a-living that makes up such a big part of life. (In fact, what I'd now consider the rest is mainly sleeping, eating, and trying to avoid doing or thinking about lifework, like when watching TV or partying.)
I mean, if you are living the life of a pleasure-seeker, things may be rather easy:
Where's the next party? And, if you are sort of unfortunate, How do I get the money do go there? (Yes, of course, it's a caricature.)
If, however, you seek sense, meaning, purpose… Well, for one, welcome to my world.
Secondly, why bother when you only know for certain that it will still end with death?
My thinking is that you do, in fact, need to allow for a coexistence of opposites in thinking about that:
On the one hand, you need to accept that your life is quite likely to end quite suddenly and stupidly, e.g. stepping in front of a car. Yet, it is about the experiences, about being lived, so you'd better - if that is what you want - go out and seek the experiences. Basically, there are two ways of doing that: the real and the virtual.
Real, when you yourself go places, such as I've now done. Of course, the world is somewhat the same everywhere. -
Homo sum, humani nihil a me alienum puto. Nonetheless, if you don't get out, you don't get the experience.
Except that there is also the virtual, and I am thinking more of books, and also video, as well as of the internet… these are possibilities for having experiences, not with all senses, but nonetheless. And they are venues for, in a way, sharing in a kind of experience of other people and other times, as well as the imagination. Not bad what we humans can do…
On the other hand, you also need to assume that your life may go on for quite a while, so there will always be more chances for learning something new or more, and a world of further experiences which is opened with more of this work.
Really, it's a luxury to even be in a position to consider these sorts of things as if they were a problem… But then, that is why some (so many?) of us sometimes envy simpler times and places when you easily knew who you were and what you were supposed to do. With great opportunities comes great responsibility to take your life into your own hands…
To me, all of that is related, in more ways than one, with my take on "home:"
Again, I'd rather like a definite answer. In this case, a place which I'd want to call and consider home, know intimately, shape the way I like it… Then again, I rather like considering the world my home, just carving out niches - basically, where my main notebook is (and nowadays, where I find an electric and network jack for my notebook computer). If you aren't quite at home any distinct place, and seek something anyway, you need to get up and get out.
Hence, I am - all the problems that arise notwithstanding (and it's not as if there wouldn't have been any problems "at home") - considering myself lucky to have jumped at this opportunity for going abroad.
Now, which book in Russian do I get first (not that I could already read and understand it, but still: I will before I go on.) And, where do I go next...
Labels: Life as Adventure, Reflections